Going along with my last entry that little setbacks here and there can become a big deal if they occur frequently, I came upon this interesting excerpt from a book I'm currently reading that demonstrates this concept in reverse - that frequent little doses of good news is a key to long term happiness.

"Making $1 million in one year, but nothing in the preceding nine, does not bring the same pleasure as having the total evenly distributed over the same period, that is, $100,000 every year for ten years in a row... Somehow, your pleasure system will be saturated rather quickly; and it will not carry forward the hedonic balance like a sum on a tax return. As a matter of fact, your happiness depends far more on the number of instances of positive feelings, what psychologists call “positive affect,” than on their intensity when they hit. In other words, good news is good news first; how good matters rather little. So to have a pleasant life you should spread these small “affects” across time as evenly as possible. Plenty of mildly good news is preferable to one single lump of great news.

...The same property in reverse applies to our unhappiness. It is better to lump all your pain into a brief period rather than have it spread out over a longer one." 

- The Black Swan by Nassim Nicholas Taleb

So I guess the adage is true - it's the little things in life that make us happy!

My first time being a bridesmaid was when I was 12 years old for my aunt’s wedding.  At the time, I didn’t know what it really meant - but I agreed anyway because I was promised a pretty new dress.

I learned at a young age that getting a pretty bridesmaid dress is a lie!  Mine was this sleeveless grayish-tan cocktail dress with a detachable rose (or maybe it was a bow?) at the waist.  Being in my pre-teen years and just starting puberty, I was still flat-chested and knew nothing about push-up bras - so the dress didn’t fit me very well either.

While I was getting ready on the day of the wedding, I remember a distinct conversation I had with my mom in regards to shaving my legs.  I had never shaved my legs before because I was told that shaving would only make the hair grow back thicker and longer.  I was hoping that the wedding would give me the opportunity to finally shave.  Disappointingly, my mom said no because I was still a little girl and no one would say anything.

For some reason, no one thought it was necessary for me to have make-up or hair done either.  (For the record, I was a pretty late bloomer with the whole being a girl thing.)  It was only when the hairstylist noticed me sitting around that he asked whether I wanted my hair styled. I sat in front of the mirror and hoped for some classy, elegant up-do.  What I got was some old fashion, braided half ponytail twisted into something on the side, decorated by a red carnation.

As I walked into the reception banquet, I was that awkward bridesmaid with bad hair, bad skin (did I mention I was hitting puberty?), braces, glasses, and unshaved legs who wore a dress that didn’t fit well.  But you know what?  No one noticed or cared. 

The experience has taught me that being a bridesmaid means the night isn't about me.  I think the sooner bridesmaids learn this, the better they would feel about wearing an ugly dress.

It's a serious question.